so much to say

summer is over
or at least fulfilled
oceans touched and blackberries eaten
ive mucked through a pond
seen sunrise
and wandered past quaries
while spotting fungi
a long weekend
made longer though the surreal lense
of sleeplessness
a hard bed crushed bruied broken and healing ribs
so much as to keep me awake
past falling lids
the twitched awake with each breath
pressed down through the matteras

in the light you can see
the relief
of how far my bones have gone
to repair themselves
my asymmetry
enhanced
irregulated
the dips and rises of one side
a counterpoint rather than mirror to the other
you can feel
where the bone has built back up
healed over
thicker
than before raising out through my skin

there were no stars in vermont
no counting of satelites
i remember when
it was a rare thing to see that star
not shooting but slowly sliding
ever steady
across the arc of sky
bundled up in wool sweaters and purloined blankets
getting damp in the dew
made unfit to throw back onto a bed
we would count them
distracted at times by those stars
that truely did fall

this time it was all rain
clouds skishing across the lawn
the top of a mountain
obscured by cloud and drizzle
we cleared the pond
my father and i
heaving wet rake fulls of sticks and mud
slowly decaying leaves and grass
by the end it was a torrent
raging out through the trickle tube
the rain that next day
flushing out
the darling beavers
who have for two years ruined the pond
who my grandmother used to blow up
with dynamite
what?
who was she?
i mean
seriously.
seven husbands.

clea and i
when we wandered dog town
spotted sap drenched mushrooms
and purple shiny caps dotting the floor
toads and tiny frogs
lept beyond my boots
barely free from the treads
for ever one that i saw and stepped past
i wonder how many corpses we left
it was like old times
sorry but it is true
back ten years ago
when we would wander for the shear sake of it.

it was a summer worth
in a weekend
i think i feel less uprooted now
but im not sure
still i keep reaching out to those unwilling, or unable
to catch me as i jump
im falling
alseep
as i lie here

i keep lying
about what ive been doing
i keep lying
down in the wrong persons arms
tonight
i will sleep again alone.

wow
can i get a bit more depressing?
wait.. no
im out of wine.